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George Bush Resume

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George Bush Resume
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George W. Bush Resume

Past work experience:

Ran for congress and lost.

Produced a Hollywood slasher B movie.

Bought an oil company, but couldn´t find any oil in Texas, company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.

Bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using tax-payer money. Biggest move: Traded Sammy Sosa to the Chicago White Sox.

With fathers help (and his name) was elected Governor of Texas.

Accomplishments: Changed pollution laws for power and oil companies and made Texas the most polluted state in the Union. Replaced Los Angeles with Houston as the most smog ridden city in America. Cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas government to the tune of billions in borrowed money. Set record for most executions by any Governor in American history.

Became president after losing the popular vote by over 500,000 votes, with the help of my fathers appointments to the Supreme Court.

Accomplishments as president:

Attacked and took over two countries.

Spent the surplus and bankrupted the treasury.

Shattered record for biggest annual deficit in history.

Set economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12 month period.

Set all-time record for biggest drop in the history of the stock market.

First president in decades to execute a federal prisoner.

First president in US history to enter office with a criminal record.

First year in office set the all-time record for most days on vacation by any president in US history.

After taking the entire month of August off for vacation, presided over the worst security failure in US history.

Set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips than any other president in US history.

In my first two years in office over 2 million Americans lost their job.

Cut unemployment benefits for more out of work Americans than any president in US history.

Set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12 month period.

Appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than any president in US history.

Set the record for the least amount of press conferences than any president since the advent of television.

Signed more laws and executive orders amending the Constitution than any president in US history.

Presided over the biggest energy crises in US history and refused to intervene when corruption was revealed.

Presided over the highest gasoline prices in US history and refused to use the national reserves as past presidents have.

Cut healthcare benefits for war veterans.

Set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously take to the streets to protest me (15 million people), shattering the record for protest against any person in the history of mankind. (http://www.hyperreal.org/~dana/marches/)

Dissolved more international treaties than any president in US history.

My presidency is the most secretive and un-accountable of any in US history.

Members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in US history. (the ´poorest´ multi-millionaire, Condoleeza Rice has an Chevron oil tanker named after her).

First president in US history to have all 50 states of the Union simultaneously go bankrupt.

Presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud of any market in any country in the history of the world.

First president in US history to order a US attack and military occupation of a sovereign nation.

Created the largest government department bureaucracy in the history of the United States.

Set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more than any president in US history.

First president in US history to have the United Nations remove the US from the human rights commission.

First president in US history to have the United Nations remove the US from the elections monitoring board.

Removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of congressional oversight than any presidential administration in US history.

Rendered the entire United Nations irrelevant.

Withdrew from the World Court of Law.

Refused to allow inspectors access to US prisoners of war and by default no longer abide by the Geneva Conventions.

First president in US history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 US elections).

All-time US (and world) record holder for most corporate campaign donations.

My biggest life-time campaign contributor presided over one of the largest corporate bankruptcy frauds in world history (Kenneth Lay, former CEO of Enron Corporation).

Spent more money on polls and focus groups than any president in US history.

First president in US history to unilaterally attack a sovereign nation against the will of the United Nations and the world community.

First president to run and hide when the US came under attack (and then lied saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1)

First US president to establish a secret shadow government.

Took the biggest world sympathy for the US after 911, and in less than a year made the US the most resented country in the world (possibly the biggest diplomatic failure in US and world history).

With a policy of ´dis-engagement´ created the most hostile Israeli-Palestine relations in at least 30 years.

Fist US president in history to have a majority of the people of Europe (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and stability.

First US president in history to have the people of South Korea more threatened by the US than their immediate neighbor, North Korea.

Changed US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.

Set all-time record for number of administration appointees who violated US law by not selling huge investments in corporations bidding for government contracts.

Failed to fulfill my pledge to get Osama Bin Laden ´dead or alive´.

Failed to capture the anthrax killer who tried to murder the leaders of our country at the United States Capitol building. After 18 months I have no leads and zero suspects.

In the 18 months following the 911 attacks I have successfully prevented any public investigation into the biggest security failure in the history of the United States.

Removed more freedoms and civil liberties for Americans than any other president in US history.

In a little over two years created the most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided the US has ever been since the civil war.

Entered office with the strongest economy in US history and in less than two years turned every single economic category heading straight down.

Records and References:

At least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine (Texas driving record has been erased and is not available).

AWOL from National Guard and Deserted the military during a time of war.

Refuse to take drug test or even answer any questions about drug use.

All records of my tenure as governor of Texas have been spirited away to my fathers library, sealed in secrecy and un-available for public view.

All records of any SEC investigations into my insider trading or bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and un-available for public view.

All minutes of meetings for any public corporation I served on the board are sealed in secrecy and un-available for public view.

Any records or minutes from meetings I (or my VP) attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and un-available for public review.

For personal references please speak to my daddy or uncle James Baker (They can be reached at their offices of the Carlyle Group for war-profiteering.)

----
Cheers,

Dan
Founder and CEO

LionsGate Creative
GoodPassRobot
Magelln
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Re: [dan] George Bush Resume In reply to
Well...if it's from the web it must be true. I used to like the guy, but now I can't stand him- thanks for posting the truth. I got him #2 behind Hitler now.
_______________________________________________________
Lem Motlow, Proprietor Lynchburg (pop 361), Tenn.
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Re: [dan] George Bush Resume In reply to
How conventient that the author attributes so many circumstantial, out of context, and "just happened to be president when something negative happened" items to his resume. Any logical human can deduce that the leader isn't in any way responsible for everything that happens during his term in office.

Philip
------------------
Limecat is not pleased.

Last edited by:

fuzzy thoughts: Apr 27, 2003, 8:00 AM
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Re: [fuzzy thoughts] George Bush Resume In reply to
There are also a few obscurities to bulk up the list.

For example:

Quote:
My presidency is the most secretive and un-accountable of any in US history.

Generally, secrets and not known by anyone else other than those involved, so how does the author of this list know the presidency is secretive? Wink

But I think the list was intended to provoke a reaction rather than provide any sort of factual argument.
Quote Reply
Re: [dan] George Bush Resume In reply to
Add to the list:

Began a war against Iraq (and against international laws) in reason of the assertion that there are still weapons of mass destruction....but still haven't found ANY! (Although the intelligence services of the US know where they are and know that they're there Tongue)




EDIT:

Oh, I forgot to add:

Another misleaded "warlord" who makes war in the "name of god"!

Regards,
Manu

Shopping Portal Shop-Netz.de® | Partnerprogramme | Flugreisen & Billigflüge | KESTERMEDIA e.K. | European Affiliate Marketing Forum.

Last edited by:

ManuGermany: Apr 28, 2003, 11:54 PM
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Re: [ManuGermany] George Bush Resume In reply to
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Began a war against Iraq (and against international laws)

This is a common argument, but I heard it wasn't actually against any laws. It was confirmed legal (at least in the UK).

Quote:
there are still weapons of mass destruction....but still haven't found ANY!

"Still" ....of course the war only came to a conclusion recently, you haven't exactly given them much chance Laugh ...they've been doing tests on huge drums of material over the past few days that showed traces of chemicals.

Quote:
Although the intelligence services of the US know where they are and know that they're there

Mmm no I don't believe the US have ever said they know where they are, otherwise they'd have gone and got them. They said they know Saddam has/had them but reports from regime members who have surrendered have said that a lot were destroyed before the war started.

Quote:
Another misleaded "warlord" who makes war in the "name of god"!

Again, that's more of a personal gripe than anything factual.....another lisk "bulker"
Quote Reply
Re: [Paul] George Bush Resume In reply to
Typical you Paul. Always picking on someone's "mistakes"....
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Re: [perlman] George Bush Resume In reply to
Quote:
Always picking on someone's "mistakes"....

Nah, that's what Dan and ManuGermany are doing to George Bush =)
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Re: [Paul] George Bush Resume In reply to
Maybe...but you got to admit that if you see something you think is wrong you just got to let the writer know he's wrong and you're right! Wink
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Re: [perlman] George Bush Resume In reply to
I used the words "I heard" and "I don't believe" ...it's just my opinion, which is only what everyone else is sharing.
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Re: [Paul] George Bush Resume In reply to
Paul, do you even have a sense of humor? Or are you just the Mr. Knowitall type?

Last edited by:

manunkind: Apr 29, 2003, 9:16 PM
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Re: [manunkind] George Bush Resume In reply to
(man)(unkind)

http://gossamer-threads.com/..._string=Paul;#157224

http://gossamer-threads.com/..._string=Paul;#148688
Quote Reply
Re: [Paul] George Bush Resume In reply to
(P)(aul)

I didn't say a word about not being good at Perl, did I? Wink

I've just noticed the few times I've come to this board and read through some threads that you pick everything and everybody apart. This time it happened with a simple joke. Something that normally would be read and laughed at. You chose to quote many lines from the joke and pick it apart and analysis it like it was printed in the newspaper or something. Lighten up and enjoy life a bit. :)

Let's say I was to post a picture that was related to this thread, like so:



Would you:

a) Just laugh because it's funny.

or

b) Quote the picture and type a 15 minute reply saying that it's not really George Bush, but it's actually an old picture of him with one of the 3 Stooges' haircuts pasted over top of it to make it look like a real picture. Then maybe post a link to the 3 Stooges website for proof of the haircut.

Tongue

Last edited by:

manunkind: Apr 30, 2003, 5:23 PM
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Re: [manunkind] George Bush Resume In reply to
I laughed all the way through your post...you've cured me!

Hallelujah, and praise the lord!!!
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Re: [Paul] George Bush Resume In reply to
The bill is in the mail. Make the check payable to (man)(unkind) Wink
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Re: [dan] George Bush Resume In reply to
i love this picture could you do something with the beverly hillbillies?
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Re: [dan] George Bush Resume In reply to
I love this extended version, how can I put it on a website where all people talk about is the "great Pres.Bush"? I can't copy and paste, not allowed. It's cmt.com message boards Dixie Chicks get the most readers.Tongue
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Re: [impeachbush] George Bush Resume In reply to
Just do a google search for "left wing distortions about President Bush's record" and you'll be able to find plenty of copies.
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Re: [ArmyAirForces] George Bush Resume In reply to
Reminds me of this recent google bomb showing how you can manipulate google rankings, do a search on Google for 'french military victories' and click on "I'm feeling lucky".

Cheers,

Alex
--
Gossamer Threads Inc.
Quote Reply
Re: [ArmyAirForces] George Bush Resume In reply to
In Reply To:
Just do a google search for "left wing distortions about President Bush's record" and you'll be able to find plenty of copies.


Conversely, a google search for "right wing distortions about President Clinton's record" Wink

----
Cheers,

Dan
Founder and CEO

LionsGate Creative
GoodPassRobot
Magelln
Quote Reply
Re: [Alex] George Bush Resume In reply to
In Reply To:
Reminds me of this recent google bomb showing how you can manipulate google rankings, do a search on Google for 'french military victories' and click on "I'm feeling lucky".

Cheers,

Alex
C'est hilare - ils seront des stiches à Paris Wink

----
Cheers,

Dan
Founder and CEO

LionsGate Creative
GoodPassRobot
Magelln
Quote Reply
Re: [dan] George Bush Resume In reply to
Some more stuff from the Web, regarding George Bush's military record (including apparent document photocopies obtained via "Freedom of Information Act"):

http://www.talion.com/georgebush.html

----
Cheers,

Dan
Founder and CEO

LionsGate Creative
GoodPassRobot
Magelln
Quote Reply
Re: [dan] George Bush Resume In reply to
Come on, putting a photo of Gore next to Kerry? That's a terrible disservice to John Kerry.

That photo of Gore is priceless, complete with title! All hail the brave information specialist (enlisted Army journalist), in country for five or six whole months before asking to get out. I guess all that typing just wore him out!

At least none of the other candidates repeatedly, and falsely, claimed to have been in COMBAT like Gore did.

Last edited by:

ArmyAirForces: May 7, 2003, 3:03 PM
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Re: [ArmyAirForces] George Bush Resume In reply to
=) I'm guessing that the site may be run by someone with democrat inclinations. Just a guess mind you Wink

----
Cheers,

Dan
Founder and CEO

LionsGate Creative
GoodPassRobot
Magelln